How To Get An Aries Man To Open Up (7 Effective Ways)

Have you ever wondered how to get an Aries man to open up or how to talk to an Aries man about feelings? Does he struggle to speak openly about his feelings? Does he jump straight to fighting instead of being calmly open with you?

If you’re dating an Aries man, I know that there is at least one struggle you’re familiar with, and that is getting an Aries man to open up and be honest with you! This is a difficult task, but one that will be totally worth it for you and him by the end of it.

If your Aries has some walls up, trust me, we’ve been there. I’ve seen it a million times. Aries men are naturally defensive! So, you’re wondering: how do you break down his emotional walls and get him to let you into his heart?

Aries men are tough nuts to crack, but I’ve noted some techniques that seem to soften them up so that they let you into their world.

Here’s how to get an Aries man to open up: though it may be difficult, you can help make the whole process easier for him.

In my years as a relationship astrologer, getting an Aries man to open up is one of the most common struggles women bring to me, and I want to reassure you of something right away. His walls are almost never about you. Ruled by Mars, the warrior planet, he is wired to lead with action and strength, and vulnerability feels like exposure to him. In my surveys, women named him closed off or emotionally guarded in more than seventy separate entries, and nearly every one traced back to a fear of being hurt, not a lack of feeling. If you want the full method for reaching his guarded heart, my Aries Man Heart Opener guide shows you exactly how.

Do Aries Men Open Up Easily?

Aries men are independent, and opening up emotionally is never easy for them. He wants people to see him as confident and self-assured, so he may keep his distance, but once his confidence is won, he will have no problem showing his feelings.

An Aries man tends not to reveal his emotions often because others may see him as vulnerable, and this is why it is important to build a solid foundation of trust in order for him to open up.

Having said that, an Aries man doesn’t open up easily. It takes a lot of time and patience to get him to open up. It all depends on his level of comfort and trust in you. Listen to what he has to say and show him compassion.

Don’t criticize him; don’t judge him. He will appreciate your patience hugely, and you’ll see him slowly start warming up. Remember, with his level of stubbornness, this is one person who will push back very hard if he feels in any way pressured.

Why Do Aries Hide Their Emotions?

Aries men hide emotions because they want to appear overly strong and confident. He wants to feel in control and would rather deal with his emotions internally than seek external support.

Read more about why Aries men hide their emotions and how to connect with an emotionally unavailable Aries man <<

How To Get An Aries Man To Open Up

1. Be Your Most Open Self First

The Aries man is not one to operate on an emotional level very naturally. Unless he’s got a chart loaded with water and air signs on the side, he’s not going to be very open about his feelings because it’s just not something he thinks about. 

So, in order to help him, go ahead and model it for him. Be your most open, communicate your thought process, how you come to your emotional conclusions, and what it is that makes you feel good. 

This is going to let him see how it’s done! Aries men may have been raised in a house where defenses needed to be up for personal protection. This means that open communication likely didn’t happen or if it did, it was only when fighting. 

Aries men often simply don’t know how to talk openly! So be the teacher in this scenario and create a safe space for when he does decide to express himself.

Learn here how to talk to an Aries man properly <<

2. Try Talking In the Car

Aries men often don’t know how to phrase their emotions. As a result, they clam up or end up saying something that isn’t actually how they feel. One of the best ways to avoid this mental hang-up in their communication is to occupy their mind with something else so that the words flow naturally without too much overthinking.

Aries are ruled by Mars, and Mars rules metal and fire, both elements of cars. As such, Aries may feel naturally most at peace while driving. They tend to be good drivers since Aries are natural strategists and are always thinking about what others on the road are thinking. 

This mental preoccupation frees the emotional part of their mind up. You may find that some of your most soulful conversations happen in the car. So, take advantage of the times that the two of you are riding around together. You’ll see that there is a notable change in how your Aries man is communicating. 

3. Ask Him Lots Of Questions

The Aries man may struggle normally to know what’s important to express and the kind of things you’re even looking to know more about. So, this is another way to show the Aries what sort of communication you’re looking for. Aries are bad at inferring what others want, so this is a wonderful tactic to lay the information you’re seeking out in the open. 

Be open and blunt with your questions without being confrontational. Aries really needs things laid out for him. He assumes that others are as to-the-point as he is, so beating around the bush isn’t a great tactic with the Aries.

Basically, if you’re wondering something, ask him. He will appreciate you showing him what it is that you’re looking for. Eventually, he’ll know enough to tell you on his own what you’re looking to see him open up about!

If you’re struggling with finding ways to connect with your Aries man on a deeper level, then you need to check out the 21 Questions to Ask an Aries Man to Share His True Feelings and become emotionally available. These questions will set you on the right track with your Aries and make you two feel connected like never before.

4. Don’t Pressure Him

As I mentioned before, Aries are often raised in homes where open communication was discouraged and the only time communication happened was during arguments. You didn’t think the Aries was being defensive for no reason, did you? He’s the sign representing war, and that’s often the type of energy he experienced growing up. 

This is why it’s important to avoid triggering the Aries man by being aggressive with how he opens up. He probably just doesn’t know what you’re looking for or doesn’t know how to calmly express his feelings. 

The right thing to do is just be open and honest about your expectations and then let him handle the rest. He’ll talk in his own time or he won’t and you’ll cross that bridge when you get to it. Remember, Aries man opening up is not hard to achieve. Honesty will definitely get you there!

Read next: How To Play Hard To Get With An Aries Man The Right Way

Over 254,331 women have already taken this free cosmic knowledge test to understand exactly how their Aries man processes emotion. Take it here and see what the stars reveal about why he holds back and how to reach him.

5. Appreciate When He Does Open Up

Perhaps the most important tactic on this list is to show thanks and appreciation when an Aries man opens up to you. It’s not natural for him to be open and honest about his emotions. Not because he’s dishonest, but because it doesn’t occur to him to want to open up emotionally. 

When an Aries man opens up to you, always notice this. It’s hard work that deserves praise! Plus, it will show him what he’s doing right so he can do more of it for you! 

Even if what he says upsets you, it’s important to not get angry if you can help it. This will tell him that he shouldn’t open up or that if he does it will lead to a fight. This eventually will have him skipping the opening up altogether and going straight for arguing, which is more his comfort zone. 

Always acknowledge his efforts to communicate and be open and he’s going to give you more of this in return. 

6. Praise His Less Macho Moments

Aries is the first sign of the Zodiac and they’re associated with the planet of action, Mars. They are associated with the first house of the body most heavily. As a result, they are so totally ingrained in their present experience that they often are too close to see differences in their own behavior.

Aries are like the ‘kid’ of the Zodiac. Kids don’t have incredible amounts of self-awareness without growth, so it’s important to keep that in mind when working with an Aries man. The best thing you can do is to make him aware of the parts of him that are more vulnerable, and how happy it makes you when you see that side.

When Aries is being helpful, sensitive, or vulnerable, it’s a good idea to let him know that you saw his ability to show that side, and it made you happy. Your Aries guy may not even realize he’s capable of opening up until someone else makes him aware of it.

Aries may be taken back when you compliment his sweet moments. Don’t be surprised if at first, he tells you his motivation wasn’t to be naturally sweet. Don’t let him fool you. Even Aries have tender moments.

7. Listen With No Judgment

I’ve mentioned that Aries is often on the defensive. This is likely because in the past they have been critiqued or attacked for being open-hearted. It’s tough being an Aries sometimes. Despite this, you can always show him that he’s got no reason to worry about you.

When your Aries does begin to open up to you, just let him talk. Don’t interrupt, don’t tell a similar story from your own life. Just focus on what he’s saying. The Aries is self-involved and won’t appreciate the conversation shifting to something off-topic.

After the Aries is done talking, keep it simple. No reasoning with him about his emotions, no telling him what he ‘should’ feel or do. Just let him know you’ve heard him and that you’re there for him. He doesn’t require anyone to fight his battles for him or to comfort him. He just needs a friendly ear.

Here’s more about what an Aries man likes and dislikes in a woman <<

More Ways To Talk About Feelings To An Aries Man

It takes time, dedication, and patience to open up an Aries man. Due to their natural belief that others are ‘out to get them,’ they do take more time to connect with others. But it’s oh so worth it if you have the energy to put into it.

I am listing a few other effective ways to get an Aries man to open up:

1. Let him know that it’s okay to talk to you about his emotions
2. Make sure to show him that you love him and care about him
3. Never use ultimatums or force him to communicate
4. Allow him to communicate in a way that’s most comfortable for him

Here’s what to do when an Aries man pulls away <<

How To Connect Emotionally With An Aries Man

Aries often needs to be led by example. Think hard about what you’d like to see from your Aries man. Then ensure that you’re walking the talk when it comes to these things. If you’d like him to be tender and sweet, then show him tenderness and sweetness.

Be willing to display all of the behavior that you’re expecting from him. Share your own struggles with him, be willing to cry in front of him, and don’t be afraid to show him your whole heart. This is how Aries can learn how to do it himself.

Eventually, he will realize that you’re not doing anything to warrant his defenses, and he will back down. This allows him to reciprocate the softer energy you’re radiating.

Read next: How To Tell If An Aries Man Likes You (7 Obvious Signs To Watch Out For)

The Real Reason Your Aries Man Locks His Feelings Away

To an Aries man, feelings can seem like a loss of control, and control is something Mars energy does not surrender easily. He would rather show you he cares through what he does than say it out loud, because saying it makes him vulnerable in a way that action never does. Many of the women in my surveys shared a version of the same story. Their Aries man admitted he was not expecting to feel so much so fast, and then he pulled back in response to his own intensity. That retreat is not rejection. It is him managing feelings that caught him off guard.

Once you understand that his guard is protection rather than distance, everything changes. You stop taking his silence personally and start creating the kind of safety that lets him lower it on his own terms. For a deeper look at the roots of this pattern, my article on why Aries men hide their emotions goes further into what is happening beneath the surface.

What Happens Inside an Aries Man Right Before He Finally Opens Up

There is a moment that comes before an Aries man lets you in, and most women miss it because it is quiet. He starts testing the water in small ways. He shares a slightly more personal thought than usual and watches how you respond. He lets you see a flicker of uncertainty and checks whether you use it against him. These are trial runs, and how you handle them determines whether the door opens further or closes again.

If you meet those small moments with warmth and zero judgment, he learns that his heart is safe with you, and he begins to give you more. If you pounce, push for more, or react with criticism, he retreats and the window closes. The way you respond to the little openings is what earns the big ones. Learning to talk to him without pressure is so central to this that many women pair it with understanding how to communicate with an Aries man the right way.

How Long It Really Takes an Aries Man to Let You In

An Aries man moves fast physically and slowly emotionally, and the gap between those two speeds confuses more women than almost anything else about him. He may be passionate and pursuing within days, yet still keep his deeper feelings sealed for months. This is normal and it is not a sign that something is wrong. The physical fire and the emotional trust are two separate tracks for him.

Patience is not passive here. It is the most active, powerful thing you can offer. The woman who stays steady, keeps her own life full, and does not demand emotional proof on a timeline is the one an Aries man eventually trusts completely. Rushing him only confirms his fear that opening up means losing his freedom, which is the fastest way to make him close.

Frequently Asked Questions About Getting an Aries Man to Open Up

Why won’t my Aries man talk about his feelings?

Because to him, talking about feelings can feel like admitting weakness, and Mars makes him deeply protective of his strength. He is not hiding a lack of emotion. He is guarding feelings that run stronger than he lets on. Pushing him to talk usually makes him retreat further.

The way through is safety, not pressure. When an Aries man trusts that his vulnerability will be met with warmth instead of judgment or leverage, he opens far more than you would expect from his tough exterior.

How do you know when an Aries man is emotionally invested?

You see it in his consistency and his protectiveness more than in his words. An emotionally invested Aries man makes you a priority, defends you, and lets you into parts of his life he keeps closed to others. He may still struggle to say the words, but his actions become unmistakable.

Watch for the small vulnerabilities too. When he admits a fear, shares a private hope, or lets you see him unsure, that is an Aries man handing you his trust, which for him is a bigger declaration than any speech.

Can an Aries man fall deeply in love?

Absolutely, and when he does, he loves with the same intensity he brings to everything else. The guardedness you see early on is often a sign of how seriously he takes the possibility, not how little he feels. An Aries man who is truly in love is fiercely loyal and devoted.

The key is giving his heart the time and safety it needs to catch up to his desire. Once he is sure he will not be hurt, the same man who could barely say a tender word becomes one of the most passionate and committed partners of any sign.

I would love to hear your story. How open is your Aries man with you right now, and where do you feel him holding back? Share it in the comments below, and I will do my best to help you reach him.

Make An Aries Man’s Heart Yours…

You are probably wondering how to make an Aries man feel better. Let him know the validity of his feelings.

It is OK to feel the way he feels, it is completely justified. 

Be a fearless leader who shows her Aries lover the way, and you’ll have a worshiper for life. Be his guiding light and help him move through the world with grace and love.

Don’t be afraid to take the plunge and build this beautiful life together.

The two of you can do anything because you are together. Enjoy your time with your Aries man! This is a relationship meant for the record books!

But it is up to you to make it happen…

If you truly want to make a breakthrough and make this relationship a success, then you are going to have to work for it…

Learn more on how to soften your Aries man here <<

Don’t be disheartened if he doesn’t commit or show his feelings right away.

Aries men need to be sure they’re not being played. They need to be completely sure about the woman they are committing to because for an Aries man, any relationship is for life and he needs to know 100% that you are in it with him.

Show him that you are serious, but just be patient because this may take a while.

Wishing you all the luck of the Universe.

Your friend and Relationship Astrologer,

Anna Kovach